The practice range was located outside Warsaw. There was a building which housed the changing rooms, offices and indoor practice rooms for when the weather is bad. Next to the building, there was a big open area surrounded by a metal fence. Behind it, there was a road on one side and a forest on the other. It was almost an ideal place for a weekend picnic. However, Dawid wasn't there for a picnic. He was there to practice battle magic. It was his first time on the range. Earlier during the academic year, there were only theoretical lessons which were preparing them for this. Dawid remembered all the safety tips and the illustrations of the spell techniques. Part of him was eager to try the techniques out. While the other part was stressed.
"Hi, Dayvid?" he heard a voice and turned around.
It was Mark, one of the foreign students in his group. He was standing on the other side of the changing room.
"It's David, without the 'y' "
"Sorry, I'm still getting used to Polish names," Mark laughed. "Excited?"
"Yes, of course," said Dawid with vague enthusiasm.
Mark didn't reply. He put his bag in the locker and went out of the changing room. Not much later Dawid did the same, as it was time to start the lesson. He exited the building and entered the field. He stood in the row with the other students. The coach was already there. He looked at Dawid and shook his head. Dawid looked to the ground and remained silent.
"Attention!" coach shouted
Students stood straight. Dawid was trying to look at the coach and hide from his gaze at the same time
"Good to see that there is proper discipline in this group. Let's start with something simple"
The coach stood sideways to the group and moved his right leg forward, and moved his hands up so his fists were right in front of his face. He looked like a boxer ready to punch.
"This is a basic pyromancer stance," the coach said," it allows to maintain balance and protect your face. Ignis!"
A fire appeared on the coach's fists and he started to move his hands forward like he was punching the air. Every time an arm was extended a fire missile was shot from that arm. For a brief moment after each shot, fire on the fist appeared smaller, but it was quickly regaining its strength. After a few shots, the coach extinguished the fire and exited the position. He swept his gaze across the students and stopped at Dawid.
"Maybe Mr Nowak will start?"
Dawid slowly walked towards the coach. He got into the position and concentrated on creating fire. With his mind's eye, he saw two sparks forming, one in each fist. Strangely, however, he didn't feel any energy build-up in his body. The coach was looking at him and waiting for results. Dawid couldn't wait any longer.
"Ignis!" he shouted but nothing happened.
"Concentrate! Imagine sparks of fire in your fists," said the coach.
Dawid concentrated even more on the fire. The image in his mind's eye became as clear as a photograph. However, he still didn't feel any energy build-up.
"Ignis!" Dawid shouted again, but still nothing was happening.
"Enough, Dawid, "said the coach, "What's happening?"
"I don't know. For some reason, I can't cast," said Dawid.
"Return to the line and watch the others."
Dawid spent the rest of the time looking at his friends casting the fire missiles. What happened was embarrassing. He was blocked in front of his whole group. He, a son of one of the most decorated battle mages in the Polish Armed Forces, couldn't cast a simple fire missile. He should have cast it without a problem. Dawid was already imagining his father's reaction. That evening wouldn't be pleasant. While thinking about it Dawid lost track of time and after a while, it was already break-time.
"A 10-minute break, " said the coach, "and we move on to geomancy. Dawid, wait"
"Yes, coach"
"What happened there?"
"I don't know. Something blocked me, " said Dawid.
"Relax, Dawid. I know you feel like you have to reach high expectations your father has for you, but you can't be so stressed."
"I know, coach, but it doesn't solve my block."
"Go for a break." said the coach, "Maybe geomancy will go better for you."
Dawid joined the rest of the group and sat at the building's wall. After a while, Mark sat next to him.
"Don't worry, I couldn't cast until I was 17. " said Mark, "My parents thought I wasn't a magic-user."
"What changed?"
"I don't know. It just came to me."
"Thank you, that wasn't helpful, " said Dawid and got up.
Mark was trying to say something, but Dawid walked away. He had to spend some time alone.
After the break, the class resumed. This time the coach took the students further into the field, so they would stand on soil instead of the paving as before. The students gathered in a line in front of him. The teacher stood sideways to them with his legs moved to the sides and knees slightly bent. Then he stretched his arms forward and a rectangular block of soil was ripped out the ground. Next, he started moving his hands in a circle which resulted in the block becoming more and more round in shape. In the end, he pushed it and the ball of earth smashed into the fence separating the field from the forest. The coach turned to the students. He was smiling.
"Who's first?" the coach said with enthusiasm
A young woman raised her hand. The teacher was impressed and invited her to take the position. She did the whole sequence flawlessly and in a very short time. Legs to side. Knees bent. Hands forward. Circular movement. Push. The ball smashed into the fence with a great force exploding the soil on almost the whole field. Dawid turned his head to the side and spit out the dirt. The coach clapped his hands and congratulated the student.
"Great job, Miss..."
"Anna Skrzynecka"
Dawid was impressed by her talent but even more stressed after seeing Ania's display. He knew that his father must not know about this, because he would expect from Dawid a lot more and he couldn't reach the current expectations. Dawid wasn't in luck. The coach chose him to be next. He got into position and extended his arms forward, but nothing was happening. Dawid was focusing on the earth and trying to make his energy connect with the earth, but he felt nothing. In the past, when he was casting spells he felt a surge of energy right before the spell's effect took place. Now there was nothing.
"Try an incantation, " suggested the teacher.
"Earth, obey me! Earth, I command thee! Tellus! Terra!" Dawid was shouting incantations, but none was working.
Next, Dawid tried concentrating and visualizing the spell's effect in his mind's eye, but it also had no effect.
"Enough," said the coach, "I'm starting to wonder if you might have a mental block"
Dawid returned to the line and was observing as other students were performing the spell.
When everybody practised the geomantic spell the coach ordered a break. Dawid wanted to go, but the teacher asked him to stay. Dawid turned around and looked at the teacher. He was prepared for a harsh critique.
"What's happening?" asked the coach
"I already told you. I don't know."
"I think you know, but don't realize it."
Dawid didn't know what to say.
"Why did you choose battle magic as your studies?" asked the coach
"Because it was what I wanted", answered Dawid.
Coach looked at him with disbelief and said.
"Is it the whole truth? Something is blocking you."
"I don't know what you're talking about", Dawid said and walked away for the break.
Coach looked to the ground and shook his head.
Dawid walked away and joined the other students for the rest of the break. Mark waived at him and Dawid came to him. They talked about various topics. School, girls, life in general. For a moment Dawid forgot about all the stress he had since the beginning of the lesson. He was just his regular self. It gave him an idea to try casting a spell. Maybe it would work. It stood up. Put his legs to the sides. Bent the knees and moved the hands forward. Then Dawid concentrated and imagined a block of earth. Still nothing. He tried the incantations, but still nothing. He didn't understand why this was happening. Dawid has always been a very good magic-user. That was a fact, not an opinion. His basics of magic teacher in high school was saying that during every meeting with his parents. This whole situation was embarrassing and Dawid just wanted to run away from the practice range and hide somewhere where nobody could find him.
"Stupid magic!" he shouted while throwing his arm down like he was casting a spell
Mark stood beside him trying to calm him, but with little success. There was no way Dawid could be calm in such a moment. If his father knew about it, it would be a disaster. Dawid's father wanted Dawid to study battle magic and follow in his footsteps in the armed forces. Dawid wasn't too keen on the idea. He considered himself a pacifist and an idea of punching people with magic wasn't appealing to him. Then, a revelation came to him. Maybe that was the reason for the block. But how? Dawid had no idea how something like that could happen. He knew he had to talk with the coach.
"The break isn't over yet, Dawid"
"I know, coach," he started, "but I need to talk to you."
"I'm all ears"
"I wasn't completely honest with you about why I chose battle magic," said Dawid.
The coach smiled.
"My father is a battle mage in the army and he wanted me to follow in his footsteps, but I'm not convinced that it is what I want. Can this be causing the block?"
"Everything can," answered the coach, "Why aren't you convinced?"
"I'm a pacifist."
"Don't want to hurt others?"
Dawid nodded. It was exactly what he was afraid of his whole life, hurting someone with his magic.
"I was afraid of hurting others with magic my whole life, but never had any block."
"The stress of not meeting your father's expectations combined with your fear and caused a block," said the coach, "It protects you from harm. It's completely natural."
It didn't help him. Dawid was aware of the stress since the training has begun. He wanted the block gone. He didn't want to disappoint his father. Before Dawid could say anything the coach started talking.
"You can't force a block to disappear," the coach said, "It would only cause you frustration, which would make the block harder to remove. Relax and accept the block's existence."
"How?"
"Relax"
Relax. Easier said than done. Dawid felt that it was impossible with him imagining his father's anger back home. Dawid took a deep breath and closed his eyes. For the first few moments, he didn't feel anything different. Then he felt something gently moving along his skin. He immediately opened his eyes and jumped away.
"What was that?"
"Just a little bit of soothing magic to help you relax," said the coach, "Continue?"
Dawid reluctantly closed his eyes again and took a deep breath. A moment later the gentle feeling returned. Dawid was trying not to think about anything, but it was harder than it seemed. He was constantly returning with his thoughts to the training, the block and his father's anger. He started to breathe deeply. People were saying that it usually worked for stress.
"Concentrate on the here and now," said the coach, "Leave the source of the stress outside, forget about it"
Again, easier said than done. However, Dawid was trying. He thought that it wasn't working when he felt a surge of energy moving up his body.
The surge of energy reached Dawid's head and it dissipated. Then he felt a warmth of fire mixed with the wetness of water and coarseness of earth on his hands. It was a strange feeling impossible to qualify as good or bad. After a few moments, it disappeared. The gentle feeling on his skin also disappeared. Dawid opened his eyes. The coach pointed the ground under Dawid with his finger. Dawid looked down. The ground was burnt, wet and it looked like someone was digging through it with a shovel. Dawid jumped with joy. He did magic. The block was gone. He high-fived with the coach and ran to Mark.
