Winter 4987, 26 Ginmoth - Winter Solstice

The morning of Winter Solstice, Shon woke up, ran, and did his drills the same as every other day, this time with only two other adult Paladins and no Squires. The Paladins left for breakfast as Shon moved from his unarmed kata to his sword forms, leaving him with only Ryuuko in the cold, quiet courtyard. Not even Lily came out to join him. Apparently the holiday was just as much an excuse for her to take it easy as it was for the others. Shon couldn’t begrudge them the desire to take the day off, but he also couldn’t bring himself to do the same.

The sun still hadn’t fully risen by the time he went to the mess hall for breakfast, but the room was alive with buzzing talk and laughter nonetheless. Plain brown paper littered the floor and tables while Squires and Paladins alike mingled and showed off their gifts to one another. Ryuuko dove to the ground and pounced on the papers, flinging some into the air to bat around like a happy kitten. 

“Yo, Shon!” Zihler called from one of the round Paladin tables, waving him down with a small brown package. Shon acknowledged him with a wave but went to the food table first, piling plenty of eggs and sausage onto his plate. By the time he joined Zihler, Thom and Rerves had already pulled up their own chairs while Rehlien, Baradin, and Kefir, dragged another round table closer.

Shon rolled his eyes at them but said nothing as he took his seat. If they were going to pull tables together anyway, they might as well sit at the larger Squire table.

“For someone who gets up so early, you’re awfully late, man,” Rerves laughed, pulling the package from Zihler’s hand and tossing it for Shon to catch. He snatched it from the air with one hand and tossed Rehlien his present with the other.

Rehlien ripped open the small package and gasped, "Thanks, man. You always give the best gifts," Shon shrugged. His gifts were always cheap, but he would personalize them. This one was a new dagger sheath, but with Rehlien's family seal embossed in the leather.

Shon had just started to open his own present when Lily’s voice blared from the door, “Oh wow! What did I miss?!” she kicked at a piece of wrapping paper and giggled as it floated into the air, then back down to be pounced on by the still playing pseudodragon.

“Shit,” Zihler hissed, then glanced towards the nearest Paladin; either the man hadn’t noticed the curse, or he chose not to call the Squire out on it. Zihler continued under his breath, “Did anyone get her anything?”

“We didn’t know she was coming.” Kefir whispered, his voice nearly a whine.

Shon finished opening his present, a set of drawing pencils, all different sizes with the softness of the lead imprinted on the side of the wood. “Thanks, Zihler,” he said, but the other Squire was still watching Lily, who'd grabbed her plate and was heading their way.

“Happy Solstice, Lily.” Thom greeted with a shy smile.

Baradin cleared his throat and spoke clearly, though he was looking at her shoulder, not her eyes, “I’m sorry we don’t have your present… We… we’ll get you something by the celebration tonight.” he looked desperately around at the other boys as though hoping they would come to his rescue with an idea.

“Present?” Lily asked, setting her plate down at Rehlien, Kefir, and Baradin’s table, beside Shon, and pulling a chair from the nearest empty spot.

“We, uh… we didn’t know you would be here, so…” Rerves tried to explain, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. Lily tilted her head at him, and he blushed.

Shon sighed, placing his new pencils beside his plate and picking up his fork, he explained, “People give gifts on Winter Solstice. We draw names in the fall, so everyone gets one and gives one.”

"And it gives us plenty of time to place the mail orders," Rerves added. 

“Oh!” Lily clapped her hands excitedly but then stopped a moment later, looking horrified, “I didn’t get you guys anything!” she whimpered, looking around the two tables, her face wracked with what Shon could only describe as guilt.

Thom rushed to comfort her, “It's okay, Lily! We’re just glad you’re here!”

“Yeah, having you here is the best present ever!” Zihler announced.

“We’ll get you something. Sorry it wasn’t ready in time for breakfast,” Baradin assured her again.

“But-” Lily started,

“It's okay, Lily, really,” Rehlien reached over the table and patted her hand, “We all got gifts already. We just need to get you something, and we'll all be even.”

Lily pursed her lips, not looking at all happy at the idea of getting a gift without giving one in return. Shon sighed again and, sliding his chair closer, tapped Lily on the shoulder. Motioning her to lean closer while the others conferred with each other, he whispered in her ear, “Let them do this. Letting them give you a gift is a gift in itself.”

“That’s stupid,” Lily hissed back at him, “I didn’t get anyone anything. It’s not fair.”

“They want to give you something. Are you not going to let them have what they want just because you didn’t give them something they didn’t ask for?” Shon answered, scooting his chair back to his plate and resuming his breakfast.

Lily hummed but then slapped the table and announced, “I’m getting you all something next year!”

The Squires stopped mid-conference and as one looked at her. “You don’t have to do that, Lily,” Thom said,

“Yeah, Lily, you-” Rerves started,

“I’m getting you all something next year,” she stated again, picking up her fork and stabbing a whole sausage with it.

Zihler, Kefir, Rehlien, and Baradin all exchanged looks, then Baradin cleared his throat, saying, “We won’t be here next year…” Kefir indicated the four of them as Baradin spoke.

Lily’s jaw dropped. Apparently, she hadn’t thought of that, “I… but…”

“A map!” Thom shouted over Lily’s stutters, then blushed, looking down at his plate. The others all stared at him and Shon tapped his fork on Thom’s plate to get his attention, then arched an eyebrow at his fellow.

“I just thought…” Thom hesitated, grinning sheepishly, “We could give Lily a map of Clearhelm this year. Then, when you guys know where you'll be stationed, she can mark it on her map, so… she can... send her gifts…”

Lily stood, then to their combined horror, climbed over the top of the table and hugged Thom around the neck. He turned bright red, though whether from the hug or heat, Shon couldn’t tell. Ryuuko launched into the air and twittered as it circled the tables.

“That’s perfect! Perfect!” leaning back, Lily kissed Thom on the cheek.

Thom pulled sharply away, wincing as a small burn, like a blistering sunburn, appeared in the shape of Lily’s lips.

“Oh shoot, I’m sorry!” still kneeling on the table, Lily flapped her hands in the air, looking around for something to soothe his burn. Ryuuko landed on Shon's shoulder, and his eyes went wide as Lily snapped up his hand and pulled him to his feet and halfway over the table to place his cold palm on Thom's face. 

Squires and Paladins throughout the room laughed. Shon could feel himself turning as red as Lily's scales and hid his face with his free hand, but let Lily hold his other against Thom's burn.

Master Daunas’s bark of a laugh rang out above the rest, and he shouted from the officer's table, “Happy Solstice, everyone!” he swept his arms out wide to take in the room but then continued with a stern order, “Now clean this mess up and get outside. We have work to do!”

***

The first set of caravans from the villages arrived shortly after breakfast. Though classes and duties were suspended for the training Squires, they were still expected to do all the setup work for the evening celebrations. Lily sat on the sidelines with Ryuuko, watching the Squires scurry back and forth from the wagons to the massive pavilion being erected in the courtyard while the villagers tended the horses and chatted happily with each other. 

She'd offered to help but had been waved down by not only the Squires but also the officers. As she sat on one of the large mead barrels watching them work, Lily realized why. They were so coordinated and smooth it was apparent she would've just gotten in the way. Thom had recommended that she help the villagers with the horses, but she quickly excused herself from that job. So instead, she sat swinging her legs back and forth on the barrel, her hands propping her up on either side of her hips and Ryuuko purring contentedly on her shoulder. 

More wagons arrived throughout the day and soon not only the large shade but also a small stage for the local musicians and tables for the evening's feast were erected and ready to go. All that was left now was for the sun to set.

For the first time, Lily regretted not having a dress. The villagers all took turns in a small changing tent and came out in what must be their finest wear. Dresses and suits in every color -made of heavy fabric with long sleeves and fur trim- made the throng of villagers look like a field of spring flowers braving the winter snow all around. Even the Squires returned to their rooms after the setup to change into their white dress uniforms with blue accents. And here she was, in her cleanest pair of loose pants and another solid color tunic. Though this one was scarlet, short around the waist, and long in the sleeve. She'd rolled the sleeves up to just below her elbow and tied the neck loose to show off a small necklace she'd purchased to match the ruby hair sticks holding up her twisted bun.

She was just wondering if she should ask one of the village girls if they had an extra dress when Rerves approached, looking very handsome in his dress whites. “Don’t you look fancy,” Lily called as he came towards her. Ryuuko let out a whistle reminiscent of Ron's flirting, which just made her giggle more.

Rerves blushed but gave her a courtly bow. It seemed more natural than rehearsed, and Lily thought she remembered something about Rerves being from a noble family, “And you as well, m'lady.” to which she rolled her eyes in a wildly exaggerated manner.

“I’m pretty sure even Nangran is dressed better than me tonight,” she said, looking over his shoulder to all the celebrants now heading towards the pavilion as the sun started to dip below the wall.

Rerves turned to lean against the barrel next to her, crossing his arms over his massive chest to also watch the others, “You look fine,” he glanced sideways at her, “Beautiful even…”

Lily rolled her eyes again and gave the Squire a gentle punch in the arm, “Don’t tease me, Rerves, I didn’t think about buying a dress…” Seeing all the young ladies her age spinning around in their long simple gowns made her feel a little jealous and second-guess her decision to never wear a dress again.

“I’m serious!” Rerves whined, rubbing his arm. She was sure it didn’t actually hurt, but it was fun to play, and it made her smile.

Lily continued to watch the Squires and villagers mill around under the pavilion as it got darker and darker, the silence between them not exactly uncomfortable, but not soothing either.

“He's in the back, by the stage.” Rerves finally said.

Lily gave a little start, she'd let her mind wander with her eyes, “What? Who…”

Now it was Rerves turn to roll his eyes with great exaggeration, “Shon,” he chuckled and added, “Who else would you be looking for?”

Lily felt herself blush though she wasn’t quite sure why. “Does he always stay outside the celebrations?”

“Yeah. He’s not the only one. Not everyone's interested in flirting and dance.” Rerves pointed with his chin at two younger Squires in particular who were standing a little away from the main gathering, watching rather than mingling. Lily tilted her head at them in thought but turned back when he said, more quietly, “Are you really not going back to the city?”

“Nope,” Lily answered simply, Ryuuko chirping its support.

“But…” Rerves shifted uncomfortably against his barrel, “You know you can’t stay here, right? I don’t know why they let you stay as long as they did the first time,” he waved his hands in front of his face as if he just realized he'd said something horrible, “I’m glad they did! Honestly. We all are, but…”

Lily interrupted him with a giggle, pushing his hands down, “I know I can’t stay here. And I don’t want to,” she shrugged, “I got bored in the city, and I don’t want to get bored here too. I want to remember it as always being fun and exciting and new.” she looked back out over the crowd, towards the stage and a head of ebony hair that stood out in a sea of blonde and pale browns, “Though there’s still some things I need to do before I leave.”

“Things?”

But Lily wasn’t listening to Rerves anymore, a pair of fires sparked to life at the edge of the pavilion, and two Squires wielding long poles began to light the candles dangling in glass orbs around the outside. “What're they doing?” She asked, pointing to the Squires.

“Hmm? Oh, they're lighting the lamps. It's honestly one of the worst jobs, since there's so many. They're all around the outside and strung up in the middle. Once they're done, the party can finally get start-”

Lily hopped off her barrel and spun on Rerves, Ryuuko taking flight towards the gathering. Tugging on the front of his jacket Lily asked, “Do you think I could help? They wouldn’t let me do anything to set up.”

Rerves laughed, patting her hand gingerly, “You can ask. Like I said, it’s not a job anyone really wants to do…” but Lily was already sprinting towards the pavilion.

*** 

Shon leaned against a stack of crates near the musicians' stage, watching as the lighters began their work and glad he hadn’t been assigned it as part of his punishment. He hadn't bothered to bring his drawing supplies this time. There was hardly a point since he would need to leave so early. He would just memorize as best he could as usual.

Ryuuko came into view first, flying ahead of Lily who immediately started speaking animatedly to the Squires with the lights. The boys exchanged looks and shrugged before she clapped her hands in excitement and hugged each of them. Shon watched with a curious eyebrow arched while Lily stood at the edge of the tent, taking her time and pointing to each of the lights, mouthing something. Counting?

Ryuuko landed on her shoulder, spreading its wings and whistling, pulling every curious face her way. Focused on her task, Lily didn't seem to notice. That or such attention didn't bother her. Finally, she nodded sharply and made a grand sweeping motion with her right hand.

Hundreds of tiny embers flowed from her palm as she moved, each one hanging in the air around her like a swarm of spring fireflies, making her golden hair and ruby scales gilter, before shooting off to their respective lanterns. The celebrants all ‘ooo-ed’ and ‘ahhh-ed’ then began clapping. Lily blushed and gave a small curtsy to the crowd while Ryuuko whistled again and his friends swarmed her to give their own compliments. 

Shon clapped with the rest, shaking his head. That was going to be the highlight of his picture collection tonight, he was sure of it. He should have known right away what she was doing. Being able to help, even a little, would make her happiest of all, and she'd looked so excited when the lighters had seemingly given her permission to do so.

Soon the musicians began to play, and the celebration started in full. Shon forced himself to look away from Lily and watch the rest of the celebrants. The long table opposite him groaned under the weight of heaping dishes of steaming food as attendees took turns filling their plates. The village girls stood in small huddles, giggling and pointing at the village boys and many of the Squires, who had also formed groups on the opposite side of the dancefloor.

Shon watched silently, wondering who would be the first to break the stalemate.

Eventually, a village boy broke away from his friends -who all patted him encouragingly on the back- and approached one of the girls' groups with a bow and outstretched hand. The girls giggled at each other, making Shon feel sorry for the boy, who was left standing with his hand out for a painful few moments before a girl finally stepped forward and took it. Together the two walked onto the dance floor as more young men made their way across the no man's land to ask girls to dance and older couples joined the youths on the quickly crowding dance floor. All troubles forgotten in the euphoria of the holiday.

“Do they always dance in pairs?” Shon jumped and Lily giggled at him, tucking her hands behind her and leaning back on the wall of crates beside him.

He answered with a nod and looked back at the dancers. But they couldn’t hold his attention, and he glanced at Lily, who was nodding to the music. “I thought you would want to be in the thick of it…”

“I don’t have a dress,” she said, motioning to her pants and drawing Shon’s eye to her clothing. Her hair was twisted up like it had been the day she'd arrived, held in place with a pair of wooden sticks tipped with rubies. It left her long neck exposed and highlighted the necklace she wore—a gold chain with a matching ruby, the color of her blouse and scales. The piece rested in the hollow between her collar bones and gently tapered in a dewdrop shape that seemed to guide the eyes lower…

He shook himself and looked back at the dance floor, seeking out Ryuuko, who liked to flit among the dancers. He found a pair of Squires instead and said, “Neither Narvin nor Kevan have dresses, and they dance just fine.”

Lily snickered. Leaning over and bumping his arm with her shoulder, she whispered, “Kevan would look lovely in a dress, don’t you think?” Shon couldn’t resist a snort of a laugh at the thought.

Lily laughed with him but then continued, “I don’t know how to dance.” she shrugged, “Though it doesn’t look that hard.”

Shon sighed, “It's not.” The Squires got lessons once a year, but he didn’t think the villagers did, and they danced just fine.

“Can you teach me?” she asked.

Shon could have dropped into the earth and would've been happy there. Why had he opened his stupid mouth? “I’m… I’m not very good at it.” he tried to explain, “Rerves would be better…” He searched the crowd for the noble Squire and found him already dancing with a village girl, "Or Zihler, he loves dancing..." Shon tried. 

“Maybe…” Lily tapped her lips, scanning the crowd -presumably for a suitable partner- but then continued, “but I don’t want to dance with them.” she pushed off the crates and spun on her toes to face him, blocking his view of the dance floor and holding out her hand, “Dance with me.” It wasn’t a request.

His mind jumped around desperately for an excuse, “I…”

“I thought you said it was easy.” she narrowed her eyes at him and held her hand higher.

He had, but he also didn’t want to explain that he danced as if someone had put rusty hinges where his joints should be. Lily looked over her shoulder at the dancers without dropping her hand, “It’s almost like they’re doing one of those double kata you guys practice together…” her hand started to fall and she sighed, “but if you don’t want to… I guess we can just watch.”

Shon took her hand.

Lily pulled him off the crates and towards the dance floor. His bruised leg throbbed with every step and he tried not to limp. She could've danced with anyone. Any one of the Squires would've jumped at the opportunity. But she'd asked him. Had implied that she would just watch unless he was the one to show her how. Shon ran his thumb over the back of her hand, his mouth suddenly dry.

Blessedly, Lily stopped at the edge of the dance floor, in a corner where they shouldn't have to worry about bumping into anyone. Shon blocked out the other dancers and watchers. It was surprisingly easy with Lily in front of him. She let go of his hand and pirouetted before turning back to him with a wide excited smile and twinkling eyes.

He swallowed, and Lily stepped closer, grabbing his hands, “So how do we start?” she asked.

“Um,” he shook his head to clear it, “Like this,” he held her right hand up with his left and draped her other over his shoulder. For the first time he had reason to be glad he was left-handed, so his sword didn’t get in her way as her fingers brushed his neck. Shon reached for her waist and pulled her a half step closer. He could feel the heat radiating from her lower back and thought that had to explain why his hands were suddenly sweating. Though his cold had already rushed to the surface of his skin. Not just where she touched, but all over, making him tingle. 

“Feel the beat of the music,” he whispered, tapping the back of her hand with his fingers, “and start with your left foot. In dancing, someone always leads, and the other follows.”

“I’ll follow you,” she said, nodding her head to the music. Shon nodded as well, and when he stepped, she moved with him, turning around him with only the slightest pressure, as if she could predict his moves.

Lily laughed as they fell into the rhythm of the music, and Shon felt more relaxed than he'd ever been while dancing before. His leg didn't even hurt anymore.

“It is like a partner kata!” Lily exclaimed excitedly, “So what if I do this…” before Shon could protest, Lily took the lead, first with her hands then with her feet. Shon kept in step with her but just barely. 

He allowed her to lead them for a few turns, then squeezed her hand and took the lead back, spinning her in place and catching her again as she laughed and slipped easily back into the role of follower. Half as many steps later, her evil giggle was the only warning he got before she retook the lead and spun him around, then came in close. Her chest pressed against his.

Shon tried to take control, but Lily relinquished only half of it, laughing as they moved as one through the music. Neither truly leading nor following, using the subtle shifts of their bodies pressed together to signal the oncoming turns and steps.

He hardly noticed when the music stopped and people started clapping. For a terrifying moment, Shon thought they might be clapping at him and Lily and looked around in a near panic until he realized they were merely applauding the musicians.

Lily laughed and leaned forward, whispering something he didn’t quite catch in his ear, “...s you.”

Shon arched an eyebrow down at her, and she smiled, though there was a hint of sadness he couldn't fathom in her eyes. Before he could ask her to repeat herself, she took his hand and pulled him away from the dance floor. “Lily?”

She didn’t answer, pulling him past the tables and away from the awning, into the cold night air. Away from the lights, to a pile of empty crates and barrels beside the sparring rings. She let him go as she spun and hopped onto one of the crates in the same motion, laughing to herself, her neck and face bright red. Probably from the exertion.

“That was so much fun!” Lily exclaimed, reaching up and removing her hair sticks. Her golden hair tumbled around her shoulders as she shook her head, “But also embarrassing,” she admitted, “I guess I really should've bought at least one dress.”

Sighing, Shon leaned against the crate beside her, crossing his arms and watching the crowd from a distance, “You’re the only one who cares.” he told her. Lily just shrugged, combing her hair out with her fingers. He couldn’t help but watch her. The delicate curve of her neck as she let her head fall back. The waves in her hair from being twisted up all day. The sparkle in her crimson scales as they disappeared below the neckline of her blouse.

“What did you say?” he asked in a whisper, looking away again, “On the dance floor. I couldn’t hear you.”

“Oh,” Lily’s hands stuttered, but she continued a moment later, bringing her hair over her shoulder, “It doesn’t matter.”

“Everything you say matters,” Shon said, his face growing cool...

Lily giggled, and he felt his blush deepen, “I think I understand now…" She said without looking at him, “Why someone might not tell me certain things.” Shon arched an eyebrow at her, and she sighed, “I said I wanted to kiss you.”

Shon couldn’t hear the music anymore, could barely hear Lily as she kept speaking, though he hung on every word, “I thought you should know, but now I see how embarrassing that can be. I already know you don’t find me attractive, so I-”

“What?” Shon managed to choke out. Lily tilted her head at him, and he spluttered, “I never said… I…” he ran his fingers through his hair. What was he saying? What was she saying? What was even happening? “You’re beautiful…” he finally mumbled, still trying to figure out what was going on. The least he could do was clear up that misunderstanding.

“I asked last time if you found me attractive… You didn’t say anything, so I thought…” Lily frowned at him and tilted her head the other way, “So, do you want to kiss me?”

Shon didn’t understand how his heart could be pounding in his ears and trying to break its way out of his chest at the same time. “I… Why me?” he finally managed to stutter out. Lily could have anyone she wanted. Any one of the Squires or… anyone. He couldn’t imagine anyone not wanting to kiss Lily. To hold her close and feel her smooth skin against theirs… Shon tried to stop that train of thought before it could go much further, but Lily had started to answer.

Her voice was as calm and casual as though they spoke of advanced fighting techniques or the weather, “Because I like you. I like the feel of your skin on mine, and I wonder what it would be like to touch your lips.”

Shon’s hands shook as he ran one through his hair again, pushing off the box to face her, “I’m cold, I…”

“I know.” Lily interrupted. Leaning forward and grabbing his hand, she rested her cheek in his palm, closing her eyes with a sigh, “Refreshing.” she whispered.

Shon stepped forward so he could bend the arm. It was somehow easier to move closer with her eyes closed.

What were they doing? There was no way this would be allowed. No way she would want him, “Are you sure?” he breathed. She was so close. She smelled like cinnamon.

Silently Lily opened her eyes and let go of his hand. Reaching up between them, she rested her palms on his chest, holding him in place with her eyes.

Shon waited for her to push him away. Lily curled her fingers in his sword strap and pulled him closer. Until his legs touched her knees.

Even without the blood pounding in his ears, Shon doubted he would be able to hear the music anymore. He rested his free hand on the crate beside her for balance while his other continued to cup her cheek, his thumb moving enough to feel the transition between her skin and scales. He could feel the heat radiate off her, calling to his cold and leaving him warm. He tried to swallow, but his mouth was dry. Their lips touched.

Lily’s lips were scalding. Hotter than her hands and smooth as silk against his. He felt her exhale with a sigh through her nose as she leaned further into the kiss.

There was nothing else in the world but her. No world. Only her. Lily’s hands clenched tighter on his uniform, urging him gently closer. He laced his fingers through the soft hair at the base of her neck.

Every move was slow. Careful. He expected to be stopped at any moment and only continued when no protest came. Shon struggled to hold himself back but couldn't resist sliding his hand from the crate onto her leg, wanting to touch all of her. Lily took a deep breath through her nose as if trying to breathe him in, then opened her knees and continued to pull until his legs hit the crate between hers. He slid his hand up to her hip.

Every muscle taut, Shon tried to force himself to relax, then felt her mouth open, her tongue darting out to touch his lips. He breathed deep, taking in the smell and taste of her as he mimicked her motion and opened his mouth just enough to allow his tongue to touch her. First her lips, then her tongue. She tasted like cinnamon too.

His control slipped and his fingers curled on her hip and in her hair. She moaned softly into his lips, and he almost lost it completely.

“Hey, Shon!”

And it was over. Shon pulled away, stepping back and looking around. His hands shook as he tried to figure out what to do with them, his heart pounding with enough speed and force to rival the drums of the musicians still playing.

Thom appeared from out of the crowd, Ryuuko perched on his shoulder. Everyone was still dancing and eating. As if the world hadn’t just disappeared then reappeared within a few heartbeats. “Master Daunas wanted me to remind you about dawn duty. He said you should turn in now, so you don’t fall asleep on watch.” Shon felt like he would never sleep again. But nodded at Thom anyway, not sure what else to do. 

The Squire looked between Shon and Lily, only just noticing who Shon had been standing with. Bracing itself on all four feet, Ryuuko shook its tail and lept from Thom to Shon's shoulder. 

Swallowing as best he could, Shon looked at Lily. She was still sitting at the edge of the crate and had resumed swinging her feet. She reached up and was twisting her hair back into a bun, stabbing it with her hair sticks to keep it in place.

“That’s so stupid,” she said. Shon blinked, not sure what she was talking about. “It was a sparring match, and I’m not even hurt,” Lily continued, bringing her hands down to slap limply in her lap. She took a deep breath, and Shon imagined for a moment that he could see her hands shaking too.

“No, it's alright.” he tried to smile at her and must've partly succeeded because she returned the look. “Thanks, Thom. I’ll go now.” he tried to signal Ryuuko to keep Lily company, but the pseudodragon just wrapped its tail around his neck and held on tighter.

He gave up, turning away, and Lily asked quickly, “I’ll see you at breakfast?” Shon looked back at her and nodded before limping away on shaky legs. He could still feel her warmth on his skin. 

***

Lily’s breath shook as she exhaled again, watching Shon walking away and enjoying the view somehow more than she had before tonight. The pommel of his sword was a blue so pale it was nearly white. The same shade as his eyes. 

“Lily…” Thom’s quiet voice broke into her fantasies, and Lily jumped, looking around and feeling her cheeks grow warm even for her, “We-"

"How's your cheek?" Lily interrupted quickly. For some reason, she didn't want Thom talking about what he'd inadvertently walked in on. She wanted to savor it. Privately.

Thom stuttered in confusion for a brief moment, then muttered, "It's fine, the Cleric healed it before we came out to set up… But Lily-"

"I'm really sorry about that, Thom, I was so excited I didn't think, and that probably made it even worse." The words spilled from her as she hopped off the crate, brushing off her pants just so she would have something to do with her hands.

"Lily, we aren't allowed to court!" Thom interrupted her, actually raising his voice to talk over her rambling apology and explanation.

She tilted her head at him and -when he didn't explain- asked, "Court?"

Thom rubbed the back of his neck nervously, watching the fortress door where Shon had disappeared a moment before, "Form… romantic relationships…" he sighed, "I just… I just don't want to see you hurt when Shon doesn't… You know…"

Know what? Lily tilted her head to the other side. Thom struggled to explain, "He… Shon's more devout than any of us, Lily. He won't break the rules, even for you."

"We weren’t having sex. Selibra and Daunas already told me last time that that wasn’t allowed." Lily explained. Thom turned bright red, his eyes darting away from her, “It was just a kiss, like the one I gave you,” just way, way, more intense. “I was just curious. But nothing’s changed.” she forced herself to shrug, though her heart was sinking into her stomach. “Shon's my favorite treasure, and I was curious. He didn’t instigate or anything. So… so you don’t have to worry. Okay?”

Lily plastered a smile across her face and looked towards the pavilion and party, willing herself to be happy. Just a moment ago, she'd felt… Well, ‘happy’ was a close enough approximation. It had felt for a few precious heartbeats that she might actually be wanted. That the one she liked touching most actually wanted to touch her back. She looked away from Thom so he couldn’t see the smile straining. She rubbed her hip where Shon had squeezed and felt for a moment his hand again.

“Let's get some food! I’m starving.” Lily announced, grabbing Thom by the shoulder and forcibly turning him to march a few steps back toward the party. She'd been selfish. She knew it. And yet, all she could think about was how much she wanted to kiss him again. To let it go on without interruption. To feel his chest below her fingers and not his sword belt... or shirt...

Lily gave her head a little shake, trying not to make it too obvious. Thom obviously knew they weren’t having sex, but she also knew mentioning that would make him too embarrassed to continue talking. He'd known it was a kiss and said it wasn’t allowed… That Shon wouldn’t… What? Do it again? Take it further?

Lily sprinted past Thom once they reached the food tables. Piling her plate with heaping helpings of meat, she shoved a particularly large piece in her mouth so no one would talk to her while she finished making her plate.

Shon had already gotten in trouble for her. Because she'd wanted to spar, he was now forced to sleep through the Winter Solstice. What would they do if he broke more rules for her?

But he wouldn’t. Thom had said so. And he would know. Wouldn’t he?

But why was kissing even against the rules?! Lily glared down at her plate, and one of the village elders sidled away from her. Why did there need to be a rule for everything? And how was it any of their business? Lily scanned the crowd and found Master Daunas flirting with a gaggle of older village women, showing off his muscles and telling some kind of exciting story that had them all gasping and giggling. In contrast, Major General Selibra stood by the musicians, his hands clasped behind his back as he supervised the gathering. As if he stood above and apart from it all.

She thought of Shon. Leaning against the boxes and watching the dancers from afar. Lily knew what she wanted, but what did Shon want? Had it been her imagination that his heart beat faster as their lips touched? He'd tasted so sweet… Lily shoved another chunk of steak in her mouth, shaking her head again.

She allowed herself to brood at the injustices of the justice system for a while longer, then swallowed and -setting down her plate- slapped her cheeks. She knew exactly what to do. She would talk to Shon at breakfast, then she would work through her drills, possibly play a game or two with the guys. She would leave in a few days, and Shon would continue his training for another year...

What she'd told Thom was correct. Nothing had changed.